Dear Stalkers

Dear Stalkers,

Lately, I have had a surprisingly high number of creepy men attach themselves to me. Not saying that you are one of them, but you may well be one. Please take note, I am not enjoying this attention. Not one bit. It's disturbing.

Just because I smile, does not mean I want to carry your children in my womb. It means I am happy and you happened to be in my line of sight. I do not fantasize about you. I do not long for your warm embrace. And I most certainly NEVER want you to corner me in elevators when I am alone EVER again. Yes this has been happening. My bosses will not let me go across the street by myself. Thank you.

Simply because I am not married or that I work Monday through Friday does NOT mean that I am desperate for a man or your so-called stature to look after me. I can, and do, take care of myself. I do not want you, you strange stranger of a man. I do not want to plan my Saturdays enjoying your sleazy company. Please stay away.

When I have my ear buds in and am facing purposefully AWAY from you, I do NOT want to talk to you. I was not asking you to promptly tap tap tap me on the shoulder and proceed to tell me how I shouldn't listen to whatever it was that I was listening to because it was too sweet and would rot my brain out. I will never listen to any type of music that involves "Bambi and the Satanites." And I do NOT want you to tell me that you don't like the fact that I am even listening to music at all because it would make it too easy for you to follow me off the bus and grab me in the dark and I would never see it coming. Thank you, but no. I am now afraid of the bus at night. I do not want other people to be afraid of you for my sake.

While I am at work I do not want you leer at me as I walk down the hall. I do not want you to stare at me through window wall in front of my desk. And yes I mean you, scary blonde butch woman. No matter how many times you flip your hair and wink at me, I will not be interested.

It is never attractive when you YELL at me down the street because I smiled and you said "How you doin" and I pretended like I didn't speak English. That or just walked away. Personally, I feel like it is inappropriate. When did "how you doin?" or "sup" become a way to flirt? Also, please do not think that I am going to jump you when you do the head nod. Just because you seem to be on the same bathroom schedule as I am, does not mean that I am waiting for you.

I don't know where all of these creepy and borderline insane men are coming from. But please know, your advances are unwelcome. I am not interested.

Sincerely,

Ruthie

On the other hand, I still like men. Just make sure I don't have nightmares about you before you give me the "head nod."